Why are you naked?

Why is this person famous? What does he claim on his taxes? Out of work musician? Public loafer?

I walked through T-Square yesterday in order to meet up with my friend who was giving me theatre tickets. And I dreaded it. Not because of the throng of tourists, smells that should not exist on earth, and the Disney-fication that has made it one of the brightest/neon places to ever blind the Blind. (I miss the peep shows in T-Square from my youth.)

I dread it because of this motherf*cker.

1. He is falsely advertising. He is NOT naked! He is scantily clad. I do not see wang and peanuts. I don't even see cheeks. Give a sista a break!
2. He is not even playing that guitar he's holding. What is the guitar for? Do you know any cowboys that play the guitar? NOPE! They ride horses into the sunset. Clint Eastwood should slap that man.
3. His camel toe is blinding me. Compare and contrast.
4. HIS PITS! I bet THERE... in his pits... is the origin of Swine Flu. So many people touchin' that man for a picture. And that's how so many people got SWINE FLU. Like that monkey in the movie, OUTBREAK, this man is the "host".
5. His haya! His what? His haya! That long blonde, Brett Michaels lookin' wig he's got goin on. That's right. His hair. But oooohhh lord... I bet the bed bug epidemic started there.

Someone get this false motherf*cker out of T-Square! He's spreadin disease, not off saving "the land". Real cowboys wear pants!