Birthday Rap: Christiana edition!

<prologue>

hey mista mista, whatchu doin' there?

wanna create a rise with what's left of yo hair?

wanna make yo body scream: "More sugar, please?"

Wanna make tall ass giraffes go weak in the knees?

call my name out in ya sleep!

i ain't no Bo Peep, dumb sheep!

Chris-Ti-ana!

Chris-Ti-ana!

Whatcha gonna do wit yo birthday CAKE?

Chris-Ti-ana!

Christ-Ti-ana!

Rub it on yo face and charm a fucking snake!

Yo bitch! Wanna try to harmonize on top of dis? (dis dis dis)

Don't think so, cuz I got the pipes that make me "Da shit!" (Hell yeah)

that's right, Texan Amazonian Diva of the opera world

dancing round yo diaphragm, with these hips, bout to do a swirl (swirl)

you think you got what it takes?

(yeah)

well then step up to the plate.

(oh!)

What? You gonna be a flake! (Huh?)

You better up the stakes!

Chris-Ti-ana!

Chris-Ti-ana!

Whatcha gonna do wit yo birthday CAKE?

Chris-Ti-ana!

Christ-Ti-ana!

Rub it on yo face and charm a fucking snake!

Laura Bell Bundy!

Can you belt this, Bitch?

Maria fucking Callas!

No, you ain't the Shit!

Pavarotti, Bad Cannoli!

Can you go that high?

Can you reach the skies?

If you do, you die!

Chris-Ti-ana! (yes)

Chris-Ti-ana! (what?)

Whatcha gonna do wit yo birthday CAKE? (eat it)

Chris-Ti-ana! (what?)

Christ-Ti-ana! (yeah)

Rub it on yo face and charm a fucking snake! (hiss.....)

hiss..........

hiss Hiss. hiss...

hiss Hiss. hiss...

hiss Hiss. hiss..

WHAT?!?!

--the end--